I often work through holidays, but today I decided to go to Rise and Resist’s flip off Trump action first. I gathered with the other marshals at 12:30pm, pulling our neon vests over our winter gear. A request went out for people who felt comfortable blocking 5th Ave. so I volunteered and we went and hung around near the corner trying to look inconspicuous until the protest gained enough people. Then, with traffic stopped for the walk light, we stepped into the street and organized ourselves into a line, holding hands all the way across fifth ave. The closest bus was confused, and instead of turning, it got uncomfortably close to us before the police turned it east on 57th st. Behind us, the crowd was having a rowdy time, yelling Fuck Trump and dancing to the drums. There was a time when blocking a street would have brought threats of arrest pretty quickly, but the few officers who were there seemed content to direct traffic away from us. Eventually a large woman in a navy jacket that said “buses” across the back showed up, and in the ensuing negotiations we agreed to give them back the bus lane. There were many expressions of support, trucks honking and people saying thank you. There were only two instances of hostility, both middle aged white men who leaned out their car windows to yell at us. The first one yelled “we love ICE” and I wished I had a piece of rotten fruit to hurl though his open window. I couldn’t make out what the second guy was saying but the marshal next to me yelled “Thank you!” and the guy looked furious. After an hour, the demo was over and we released the street and went to see about getting the drum kit off the avenue and waved to the anarchists who were doing their own thing and wound up caught in the maze of barricades in front of trump tower.
Since I was already on 5th ave, I decided to wait for the bus. I was standing at the bus stop, when suddenly a young man pushing a cart piled high with large boxes decided to cross in the middle of the street right where I was standing. He couldn’t see me because of the boxes, and he was behind me so I couldn’t see him, and he ran right into me, knocking me over. This is not the first time I have been glad for winter layers protecting me during a fall. The young man grabbed me and set me back on my feet, apologizing profusely, and the continued on his way to the Fed Ex truck parked across the street.
I made my way to Bay Ridge to feed and water my cats. Smokey always has to greet me at the door, so I saw him first and then the empty dry food bowl, so I filled it, and then turned to bring some water upstairs and saw Saucy, lying on his side, dead on the floor. I don’t know what happened – he was fine when I saw him yesterday, and even dead he looked fine. He looked like something sudden happened, like he was walking across the room and just fell over. I know bigger cats can be prone to heart attacks and they are very sudden. Not thinking about the lack of running water in the building, I touched him w my bare hands, checking for breathing even though in my heart I knew he was gone. I took care of his body, and then grabbed a scrubbing wipe to clean my hands. I had planned to stay a while, do some odds and ends, but I was so rattled that I fled, heading back to Stephen’s place with tears blurring my vision. “This is your fault,” said the unhelpful voice. “If you…” “Shut up,” I told it “this might have happened anyway.” But the guilt had already spilled into my sadness, the two mixing into a sludge as green and oily and toxic as the Gowanus.
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