In translation

I was working with a telephone translator for a session late in the day today because my Brooklyn schoolyard spanish is fine for basics, but kind of heavy on the inappropriate vocabulary and totally inadequate for technical details of things like immigration policy. My client is a gender non-conforming person who was tortured as a political prisoner in Nicaragua for being in Sandinista Youth. They still are very much an activist, so they were asking me about upcoming Pride events. As I was telling them that Queens Pride has made Andry Hernandez Romano, the gay make-up artist who was kidapped by ICE to El Salvador, their Honorary Grand Marshal, the translation service suddenly went dead. I had sensed the translator's hesitation over certain words, but I thought they might just be unfamiliar with some of the terminology. But there was no mistaking the abrupt silence. An operator at the translation service came on the line and said something about about technical problems. "The problem here is homophobia," I said to her. She patched us through to another translator, a young woman, who did not know the spanish words for "queer" and "drag" but said them comfortably in english. The conversation moved on to the disastrous House bill. I have been feeling off-kilter since it passed, but making an effort to do the next thing in front of my face. This was the first time I have had to explain it to a client. As I went through it, point after terrible point, my hands started to shake. I hid them under my desk and continued explaining. All of a sudden, a flood of tears poured down my face. "Lo siento," I said. "Creo que esta es la primera vez que esto realmente me ha golpeado la mente." I'm sorry, I think this is the first time this has really hit my mind. I struggled to pull my work face back on, the face that listens to all sorts of horrors day in and day out. "it's just that everything everyone has fought for since the civil rights movement, even before, is being destroyed." The client nodded their understanding, and we moved on to details like medications and metrocards before we ended and the client stepped into the hall. The translators never say anything after the client conversation ends other than "translator disconnecting" but this young woman said "I just want to add that that you guys do make a difference." And she disconnected the call.